How to avoid being a serial dater
Registering on dating sites, a man feels like he is in a store with toys on Christmas and it is so difficult for him to choose the only one girl he likes. He starts his communication with many girls and makes a decision to meet Ukrainian singles – all of them. Planning to visit Ukraine, he arranges more than 30 meetings with ladies, hoping that at least one girl will be exactly the right one he has been waiting for all his life. But is it so?
Meeting with the one lady, then with another one, then with a 30th girl look like you are wasting yourself. You always have a backup option, so you do not make an effort to build a relationship with any of them; you know that there will always be another one. Thus, it becomes very difficult to track down your feelings and understand what you really want.
In the flow of meetings you can lose yourself and turn into a serial dater. Such a category of men doesn’t need sincere, pure relations, because they scatter too much, they want to capture all the girls they see with their attention. Serial daters use absolutely standard methods of dating and “pick up” the girls in order to attract and charm them, and then forget about the Ukraine beautiful girl. The reason for polygamous men is not in their nature, but in the life experience and the society in which they grow. Men of 30 years old are usually ready to marry and you can hear the phrase, like: “I want a family and children.” He is not going to start a family with 5 women at the same time, like the Arab sheikh.
Therefore, we can say that each man can become a serial dater. There are two reasons for this: insecurity and excessive attention from women. As to the first reason, everything is clear; a man wants to raise self-esteem in this way. And as to the second reason, it is related to the fact that in childhood only women cared of him and always were close to him: his mother, grandmother, sisters, and girlfriends.
Serial dater is a disease
Some scientists consider being a serial dater as a disease. And it has a medical name: “intimacy phobia”. This “terrible disease” affects men who are intimidated by long-term intimate relationships with women. “The patient” can’t stop and have the relationship even with the most charming and attractive lady because the main force that makes changing partners like gloves is fear and sometimes even panic.
Serial dater is made of contradictions. They are self-confident in appearance but this is only a mask, under which there are hidden doubts about their own masculine virtues. He is burdened by the constant need to be the first in the eyes of every woman. Striving for intimacy, a serial dater is subconsciously afraid of it.
Sex isn’t the goal
A serial dater meet Ukrainian singles to feel secure: if two or three point him at the door, the rest will remain with him. He is not sure that he will be the best in bed and, in order not to experience a severe tragedy; he tries to break up with the partner first, automatically getting the reputation of a deceiver. Affair with one woman lasts no more than a few weeks.
The most interesting is that serial dater’s relationship does not necessarily end in bed because sex is not the goal itself for them. If they were unable to have sex with a Ukraine beautiful girl, they do not even worry because there is always another woman to date with. Serial dater thinks that all women do not particularly differ from one another.
Is there a woman for serial dater?
For a serial dater, a woman will not be dangerous only if she looks like a rubber doll sex toy. It forbidden for her to be intrusive. And if she wants to keep relations with him for many years, she can claim only the role of his girlfriend who is always ready for sex.
Some women try to show motherly feelings and care to the serial dater and they often achieve closeness after that. But as soon as the relationship becomes intimate, he begins to fear that they will grow into addiction and he runs away in panic.
At the end of life, being totally alone, he blames the fate that did not give him that woman who would understand his delicate and gentle nature.
The dream of any serial dater is to have a wife who has incompatible traits of character: on the one hand, she has to be his support and on the other, do not infringe his desire for freedom and a sense of independence.
Perfect relationship for serial dater is a loving wife who does not know and does not want to know about his affairs. If a woman is ready to have such a role in his life, then she can rely on a strong family.
Loneliness among Admirers
Having hundreds of women, a serial dater still feels very lonely. He suffers from this and tries to forget about everything working hard.
Some men, especially in adulthood, stop having love affairs thanks to the strong nature of their wives (yes! sometimes serial daters have wives), and their constant control and pressure. Maybe because of the fear, maybe because of the revelation or hassle, associated with other women.
Intimacy phobia can’t be treated. You can get rid of it only for health reasons – when the disease disappears along with the libido.
In France, they say about serial daters: “Monsieur has a big heart …”. Maybe you should think about your model of behavior and building relationships and open your big heart just for only one.