Lust or love? Relatioship tips!
Twins are what they are: love and lust. What do you feel?
Human feelings are so different that it is impossible to give a precise definition to each of them.
Love and lust are the most vivid of all the human senses. These two feelings are rarely found separately from each other. Usually they are woven into one knot and if they present in the relationship, then they can significantly complicate the situation. How can one understand is it love or passion?
Difference between love and lust
What is the difference between lust and love? Is it the first stage of relationship, during which love is formed? Is lust the opposite of love? What is love? Does it exist without lust? For some people, love is an all-consuming fire of desire to be close to a person, to breathe the same air, to look in one direction, to think the same way, to walk holding hands, to live long and die in one day. For others, love is irrepressible craving for a person, even for a week, a month, a year, it does not matter, the main thing is to feel being pulled like a magnet. Some people think that love is a responsibility and concern first of all: if I really love you, then I must make you happy. Some humans are ready to say on the first day: “I love you.” And to someone even ten years is not enough to declare with all confidence: “Yes, I love you.”
Experienced people state: the faster you were attracted to a person, the faster you wanted sexual intimacy, the faster you realized your incredible desire and the less you talked about love, the more likely you experienced lust, but not love.
Love differs from lust in goals and speed. Love goal is to make another person happy and therefore it grows slowly. In order to work hard and sincerely on someone else’s happiness, one must know the future master of this great happiness.
Lust also has a goal to possess another person, and therefore – it does not wait: a person who feels lust wants to have another person in his power, and he wants it now. That’s why for real love time is not a test, that’s why lust goes away with the time. That’s why some couples stay together for years, while others fall apart in a few months.
Lust can be very close to a real deep feeling. Once you yield to it and at that moment you are able to destroy everything you had. Only a few can withstand it. And the majority wants to sink into it and does not imagine a relationship without lust. Therefore, we forget someone in two days, and we dream about hot Ukrainian girls for decades, remembering rare moments of meetings.
What is the origin of these persistent emotions and wild experiences when we feel lust?
The burst of energy and good mood causes serotonin and dopamine, which are developed in the period of experiencing lust. Due to the presence of dopamine in the body, a person has a strong desire to give up everything, not think about anything, and, disregarding all the rules, yield to what he wants.
As scientists say, endorphin and enkephalin, which are developed subconsciously, in the process of experiencing lust, affect in the same way as drugs do. The time of action of these hormones is limited. Over time, the body’s reaction to these hormones is “smoothed”, so there is a desire to increase the dose to experience the sensations with the same strength.
Passion is chemistry, the reaction of our body, regardless of the influence of our personality. If you compare emotions with spices, you just have to imagine what will happen if the chef adds a whole packet of red pepper in a dish! Too spicy, but there won’t be any taste.
Relatioship tips to recognize the true feeling
Psychologists say that true love has the same features as friendship – the same goals, life principles, beliefs, requirements for each other. To distinguish lust from love is not so difficult and the following relationship tips will help you to understand your feelings at the moment.
- If in the presence of a partner you begin to experience anxiety, your heart rate increases, and the world around you literally doesn’t exist (because you are focused on the object of your desire), we have all signs of physical dependence of a person. Even if after a few months these feelings do not change with calmness and relaxation in the presence of hot Ukrainian girls, you develop a subconscious dependence of a partner that is unlikely to lead to something good. Harmonious relations can be called only those where there is peace and a permanent feeling of security.
- You always want to be close to your partner, and even if you have to be apart, then you start showering your lover with messages: “Where are you?” and “What are you doing?”. Total control is a bad way to tie a partner to yourself. Sooner or later, they will get tired of it, and they will intentionally hide their location from you only in order to “win” some personal space.
- Any conflict ends in bed. On the one hand, this is a good opportunity to bring a little fire into the relationship. But if you can’t solve the problems through constructive dialogue – you are in trouble.
- Lust grows into addiction at the time when sex doesn’t play the first role in relationship, and the need for bright emotions remains, so you begin to inflate conflicts with nothing. In loving couples, everything happens exactly the other way around: when the first months of lust are over, smooth and calm relations begin in which each partner feels comfortable
- All-consuming lust can sometimes play a cruel joke with you. When you depend on your partner and are so afraid of losing the “source of your bright emotions,” you begin to forgive impermissible things like rudeness and disregard. Please note that a truly loving partner will never allow himself to offend his second half, but instead will try to nurture their self-confidence.
So before diving with your head – think about where you dive. If in lust – count nine and a half weeks and get ready for parting. It is known that lust lasts during this time. If in love – then do not rush and do not wait. Just Love.